Who has your power?

“When you can’t control what’s happening, challenge the way you respond to what’s happening. That’s where your power is.” – Unknown

Who has your personal power? Do you have it, or have you given it to someone else?

Many times in life, we find ourselves in situations that we believe we have no control over. Either people treat us a certain way and we do not try understand why; or we enter a situation and suddenly, we’re dumped with a whole lot of negativity or responsibilities and our energy is drained. Gone. In either instance we hardly stop to ask ourselves how we’ve allowed either to happen. We believe that these things happen to us and we have no control over it. So, we give up. Until we find ourselves in a place where we believe things just keep happening to us and we still do not stop and ask ourselves “how should I do this differently?”

In many instances, we become so caught up in this cycle that every next decision is from a place of fear. And just like that, we’ve given our personal power away. We’ve allowed someone else’s actions or words to shake us to our core and we do not know what to do. So, we do what we’ve always done; we re-act in the same way we’ve always re-acted and just like that, we’ve handed over our personal power to someone or a situation that doesn’t deserve it.

Taking one step back; we need to make the decision on whether we want things to change. We do this by asking ourselves if we enjoy getting caught up in the emotional turmoil and if we enjoy continuously making decisions that do not serve our souls. Blatantly put: Do you want things to change? If not, you might as well stop reading this post here.

If the answer to the above was yes, then the next step is to reflect on when you lose your personal power and who or what do you give it to. Do you find yourself reacting in the same way to the same situation every time? Do your different circumstances that have occurred and seem to keep occurring, have you reacting the same way in each? When you react do you feel weak and less grounded than before your reaction? Do you feel more anxious and stressed out after you react than before?

After this long reflection where you accept responsibility for your own actions and reactions, the not so final step is to own your own personal power. It’s to accept, understand and believe that No one can take your power away from you without your permission. No one. It’s yours. You own it. And no one else. And if you find yourself in a situation or with someone who constantly seems to be making you feel weak or stressed, then the only way to hold on to your personal power is to change your response. This doesn’t mean you must change who you are or your character but to change those personality traits that are adaptable.

How? I hear you scream!

You need to understand your fears; understand your triggers and when you catch yourself in the situation again, ask yourself if you’re willing to give away your power over and over again. This will allow you to respond differently. And there may be times when no response is the different response. Hold on to your personal power. Make your own decisions on how to act and react. Make your own choices that affect your life. And if you do however find yourself in similar situations constantly with similar types of people, it means you haven’t learnt your lesson. It means you’re still responding the same way. It means you keep giving away your personal power.

And remember, you are the only one who can change how you respond. And you are the only one who can give away your personal power.

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